Hello, my name is Kiki and I have an addiction to reading news articles on the internet...

I acknowledge that I have problem. It all came to a head when I began graduate school in 2001. First I had to give up reading for fun. When I read a book, I will not set the book down until I am done. I simply can't function properly in graduate school if I spend three days at a time rolled up in a blanket on my couch, wearing PJs, failing to shower or eat any substantial food besides that which I can grab with a hand and stuff in my mouth (usually found in boxed or bagged packaging, bearing the label "junk food") all for the sake of finishing the book I was reading.

The next to go was TV. I easily become addicted to TV watching. If the television is on, I my eyes become glued to the set and I cannot pry them away, nor can I accomplish anything else (for all you multitaskers out there, I simply don't understand your ability to watch TV and do five other things at once). Not only am I unable to shift my focus to anything else occurring around me that is not in the direct line of vision (often people will stand in front of the TV to get my attention), but I cannot simply turn the TV off. Just like reading a book, somehow I can not be gratified unless I see something to completion. The problem with TV is that once a show is over, something else begins. There is no end to it and I have been known to watch TV until 4am. After days of TV watching, the TV takes over my brain and I begin to feel like I cannot find Satisfaction in Life unless I'm watching TV. I become empty, hollow, with no other purpose than to watch TV for hours. But then, I am never gratified because TV never comes to completion!

So you see, I was not too bothered to give up TV cold turkey. However, my addictive personality came up against a new nemesis, the internet. The internet combines my love of reading with the never ending stream of information, a la TV. I fall upon news sites and after reading one article, I discover an interesting link. Upon reading the other article, I follow a link to another article. I cannot bring my internet time to some satisfying conclusion! I will read like this for hours, never exhausting the potential reading materials. As the hours tick by like minutes, I slowly emerge from my haze to the realization that I have two or three hours of work to complete for the next day and it is already midnight. For the past week, I have not drifted into sleep until 3am. In fact, my body is starting to act like I'm not supposed to get serious about work until way past midnight. Truly, this cannot go on!

So I confront my nemesis...will I learn self-control? Can I possible reverse years of learned experiences that resulted a deeply ingrained desire to see EVERYTHING to fruition? By the sheer force of will, can I restrict myself from something I hold dear to my heart? I do not think I can live without the internet! It is not possible to cut the internet out of my life. It is necessary to my existence as a grad student, yet it is eating away at my effectual completion of my grad program (every wasted hour gets tacked on to the back end of my expected graduation date).

Must. Turn. Off. Computer.

You know you're obsessed with the computer...

....when you don't go to the bathroom or fix yourself food because it would require prying yourself from the computer.

You know you're obsessed with school when...

you're conflicted about taking a few days off during spring break. My family asked me to spend this week with them because in a couple of weeks my parents are moving. My first thought was, "Oh, no. I'll never get anything done down there."

I'm pretty disgusted with myself for thinking that. Actually, I'm laughing pretty hard at myself now. I hope you are laughing, too (rather than shaking your head and telling me I need professional help).

I've gotten over myself and now I'm excited about seeing my family and dreadfully sad that my parents are moving. I can't believe they are moving. Wait, they move all the time, why should it surprise me this time?

You know you're obsessed with school when....
you paint the closet in the measurement lab over spring break. I really do need professional help, but that closet was discusting! I like to work in a clean, crisp enviromnent.

You know you're obsessed with school when...
you feel the need to justify you're action of painting the lab over spring break. There are less people around. It's the perfect time!

You know you're obsessed with school when...
you derive supreme enjoyment over planning out your graduate course of study.

You know you're obsessed with school when...
You troll the internet for summer courses at educational assessment institutes and get really excited about taking off to Oregon for a summer conference in assessment, regardless of the cost.

You know you're obsessed with school when...
You constantly check your online class to see if someone responded to your post as if it was a chat room rather than a class.

You know you're obsessed with school when...
you feel like you can't go a whole week without meeting with your research group.

You know you're obsessed with school when...
you really do wish your seminar class was being held tomorrow.

You know you're obsessed with school when...
you dream about how to best analyze your data.

You know you're obsessed with school when...
you only write about school on your blog.

It's spring break, I think...

You know what spring break means to me? More time to accomplish something school-related. I don't know what I'm going to do when I'm not in school. Is there life outside of school? Not that I'm aware of.

One of my colleagues and I spent all day holed up in her office working on our research project together. She already had a bunch of stuff written for our paper. I felt a need to work on the IRB application. Given that it took my other research group nearly two weeks to write the IRB, I was focused on getting it done sooner for this project.

Oh! I just thought about how I need to contact one of the teachers to see if her principal okayed our project.

Later.