Back from INS conference

I'm back from the International Neuropsychological Society conference with one small revelation: I'm not that interested in neuropsychology anymore. In fact, I was bored out of my mind during the paper sessions on the first day. The only thing I found interesting and exciting was the paper session on measurement equivalence for various neuropsych tests across different patient populations and normal controls. Yes, that solidifies it. I'm no longer interested in substantive areas except where they may serve as a backdrop for issues in measurement and assessment.

However, I did enjoy myself when it came time to present my poster and the other grad student's poster. I didn't feel like it was very important to stand by the other grad student's poster the whole session, so I meandered off and pestered a few other people about their posters. I may have a couple new potential collaborations, which is the last thing I need to be adding to my plate, but...oh well. I'm excited to say that one of the conference attendees came up to me while I was in front of my own poster and asked if I was an assistant professor at insert-name-of-my-university-here, because he just got a position as a prof at a university within the same state and not too far away. I was a bit surprised. Finally! I now look older than I am, apparently. And I give off the impression that I'm more advanced in my career than I actually am. I was quite pleased. So I explained that I was still a grad student, but that I often confuse myself for a professor, so I can understand how he might, too. He, he, he. Then I went on to say how I sometimes accidentally refer to my colleagues as if they were my grad student advisees. Yikes. He, he.

Anyhoo, Research Associate #1 came to the last day of the conference and he chimed in later with his own assessment or impression of me. Apparently, he thinks I have a big ego. Once, again, I was surprised (well, maybe not THAT surprised). But, he's also the one who thinks Fav Prof has a big ego, when Fav Prof is very much aware of such things and purposely engages in behaviors that give off impressions that are not truly accurate if you look below the surface. I would have to say the same for myself. I like to act egotistical sometimes, but I'm usually being facetious and making fun of the institute of higher edu-ego. You know, intellectuals are no different from people who value fame, youth, and beauty. Many intellectuals undergo plastic surgery to enhance their egos. They spend a great deal of time comparing each other on intellectual ability and idolize those who are the most intellectual amongst themselves. Our beauty contests take the form of citation contests. And our fancy cars are the most prestigious journal articles in which we manage to publish. Our Oscars and Grammys are the verbal acknowledgements of our research findings by the speaker of the invited plenary. Ahh, the list of analogies could go on, but we all get the picture.

I really am a project manager

I just recently started the GRA job and I thought that I was going to answer to the other graduate student involved in the project. The Project Coordinator gave me that impression because the other grad student had content expertise and previous experience, whereas I...well...I don't know anything about our project. So I let the other grad student contact me first and followed along with her attempts to coordinate a time to talk over the phone. But, when we finally did talk over the phone, it became apparent that she wasn't exactly going to lead this thing, so I took over (as I always do, it seems...hmm, is it ever possible to have a collaboration where there is no obvious leader?). So anyhow, when we met with our Project Coordinator over IM, I lead our end of the deal again. But, I don't think I really want to be leading one more thing. Okay, maybe I do want to be leading, it seems so natural to me.

My Advisor rustled up three undergraduate students for us and ever since then I've been far more excited about leading the research group. I wonder if perhaps I was holding back because I feel strange about leading a group of graduate students when I'm still a graduate student myself. I'm not even a postdoc. I'm just glad that the undergrads can take the bulk of the testing responsibilities because the other grad students are more busy this semester and grad students should minimize their role in testing and maximize their role in supervising.

Now I have such a strong urge to get these projects going. I want to finish all my projects this semester and move on to writing them up for publication. I'm actually tired of collecting data, and for the first time, I've decided that I don't want to be conducting research next semester. I want to be teaching instead. Shocker, I know. I'm not that good at multi-tasking and I've never really attempted to take classes, conduct research, and teach all in the same semester. I just don't think it would be possible (which is why I'm so concerned about the neuropsych externship, GRA, research, collaborations, and classes this semester). So next semester I want to support myself by teaching and then take classes and prepare a dissertation proposal (I'm not going to wait until I'm done taking classes to start the dissertation or I'd be in school forever).

I just wonder how hard it will be on me to give up my role as project manager. Hmm, I'll have to figure out how to channel that into teaching. And I'd better start enjoying teaching more, too. We'll see....

Conference Presentations Galore

Next week I'm heading off to the International Neuropsychological Society conference in Oregon. I've never been to that part of the country before. I'm looking forward to seeing the sights, but I'm more interested in the conference itself. Posner is presenting on self-regulation. I can proudly say that he's my academic great uncle, since he was on the dissertation committee of my former advisor. So I've been running around printing my poster, buying a mail tube, and all other such things. I still need to create a handout and print off a bunch. Sigh, just one more thing to check off the list.

Last week Research Associate #2 emailed me the APS conference call for papers. It was the second-to-last day to submit and she wanted to see if we could submit something. So I figured we could change the titles on our current presentations for RMPA in April, cut the abstracts down to 500 words, and submit the same stuff for APS in May. He, he, he. Everybody does that, right? I'm certainly not going to be able to make it to that conference, so we put her name first on both submissions, which makes it even more likely to appear that the submissions are about different studies. He, he, he. Sometimes I question my own sense of ethics and professionalism, but not now apparently. :)

With this recent conference craze, that puts me at three conferences in the first part of this year. Plus, the Neuropsychologist just informed me of the American Academy of Clinical Neuropsychology conference in June, which I'd like to attend. Now the tally is up to four. Conferences galore, indeed.

Time

I wish I didn't have to be so efficient with my time. (read: gee, I wish I could afford to waste my time).